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What do we know about what supports caregivers? In a previous column I suggested six things; a notebook (can we link to previous columns?), knowledge, skills, a plan, occasional respite, and our continued friendship with the person receiving care. This column is about acquiring and using skills.
A skill is the learned ability to perform a specific action or task with good execution and successful results. Skills are developed as we acquire them through training, practice, and experience. They are not innate, even people skills such as empathy or active listening.
One of the most compelling caregiver guides of the early days of the Alzheimer’s Association was the Male Caregivers Guide, written and published in Iowa farm country. At that time in farm culture household roles were typically divided by gender, with the husband spending 12-14 hours in the barn, on the tractor, out of the house and the women focused on the household -cooking, cleaning, managing children etc. (sadly no longer in print)
Farmers who had wives who became frail had few, if any, household skills. Recognizing this, the first section of the Guide zeroed in on information and task practice on these fundamentals.
This points out two things: When you are a caregiver, roles will change and that we can adapt. We all know the spouse who managed all the bills who, because of disability, had to give way to their partner, with no time to learn or practice, all at once and learning on the fly in a crisis.
Depending on the needs of the person for whom you care developing personal care skills might be important, most elder care experts believe that there are wrong and more successful ways (and shortcuts) to assist another with activities of daily living. Providers and social workers use the acronym “ADLs” which is not a concept most of us have even heard or use until we must. These are:
Ø Bathing & Hygiene: Washing the body, brushing teeth, and grooming.
Ø Dressing: Selecting appropriate clothing and physically getting dressed or undressed, including managing zippers and buttons.
Ø Toileting: Getting to the toilet, using it properly, and cleaning oneself.
Ø Transferring (Mobility): Moving safely between positions, such as getting in/out of bed or standing from a chair.
Ø Eating: The physical act of feeding oneself (does not include meal prep.
Sources of training in personal care skills include voluntary or government health organizations, such as https://www.dhhs.nh.gov/programs-services/adult-aging-care/aging-and-disability-resource-centers/caregiver-support-services.
Skill building by provider organizations is another valuable resource such as. https://hhhc.org/resources/helpful-links-and-resources/#caregiver-support
For some, sharing caregiving wisdom in a setting such as a support group might be their jam. For others it might be taking an online course such as Powerful Tools for Caregivers
Practicing new skills should translate abstract knowledge into action and directly boost your confidence.
Michael Splaine has worked with older adults since 1986, primarily people with Alzheimer's disease and related dementias, their families and professional caregivers. He is the principal of a small advocacy and government affairs consultancy and has collaborated with leaders in Alzheimer's organizations across the U.S. and in more than 60 countries, representing them at the World Health Organization and the United Nations. His columns will provide information and perspective on aging issues.
